1996 Heather Would Be Proud of Me

Let's Reflect...

My 3rd graders in Hangzhou, China

I have been waiting my entire life to make it to where I am now. I remember in middle school thinking student teaching was so far away. So, how would I reflect my experience in methods? I think I "made it." As my blog title indicates, I did not think I would make it through methods. But, before I began methods, there were many questions buzzing through my mind as to how I address myself as a teacher. Then after receiving an "R," I began to question whether I was fit to be an English Teacher. Like other English majors, I am excellent at English, but just because I preform well in my English classes does NOT mean I am a good teacher. My conceptual unit suffered because I was not capable and successful at writing a rationale. I never fathomed that teachers would have to explain themselves in formal rationales! When we were students, we assumed teachers knew their material and taught it to us in a loving and forgiving way. In addition, the principal was not a "pal" at all, but the big wig of the school who called our parents and scared us anytime they saw us in the hallway. After making the distinction between what I assumed teacher did and what they actually do, I began to understand the profession a lot more than I did the previous semester. Working with my cooperative teachers really provided me when the reality of teaching and important things to think about before stepping into the teaching world. My coops supported me in the classroom when I taught my extended lessons and I am so glad they did because I was discouraged after having that "R" placed on my forehead. Having an "R" on my forehead felt worse they having an "L." :(  The benefits on this dreaded "R" though I feel were not realized until I made my revisions to the assignments Dr. Shannon suggested. They turned out three times better and contained the focus I had been missing. I even recall texting Dr. Shannon that she would enjoy my student learning map post-revision because I had that much confidence in my work. Confidence was on of the main goals I had hoped to accomplish through my time spent in methods. I believe I had a reality check which included: understanding not everything I submit will be perfect, it is okay to revise, and there are people who can praise and criticize you. Through this reality check, I lost my confidence and spirit as a teacher for a brief amount of time. It was through the revisions, advice, guidance, and support that I regained my integrity. I know right? What a heart-warming reflection! 

Post-methods, I feel that I am prepared for student teaching. I have finally accepted that teachers do not know everything about their subject and that is okay. We know how to teach, but we can also learn along with our students and teach something we have not read before. As I said in one of my earlier blogs, I want my students to learn something about themselves and express this to me. Teaching English is not just about literature and grammar, but about living life-this is one philosophy I will continue to stick to when asked the question, "why do you want to be a teacher Heather?" I want to be a teacher to help students find and discover that they too can be successful in school and in life. Watching students' eyes light up, when they understand something or are inspired by my teaching, really does make teaching worth it. This is why sometimes I hated leaving for the day after I spent time with my coops. I was enjoying my soon-to-be job and did not want to leave just yet. I know you may think, well this feeling will get old, but I disagree. The more I am immersed in a classroom, the more I find things I love about teaching. I enjoy the challenge and feel amazing when I make a connection with my students. I promised myself when I was a little girl that I would become an amazing teacher and be the friend who listens to my students when they just need someone to talk to. I think my childhood Heather would pat me on the back and say I will make a fine teacher as long as I have the passion in my heart that I do now. Methods brought back this passion and I want to thank Dr. Shannon for this. This class, along with my coops, has changed and strengthen me as a teacher and I am excited to begin student teaching in the spring. 

Childhood Heather

We don't take pictures of our books...we take pictures of our students :)